I have always believed that unsaid words have power over us, and that by saying whatever it is that we shy away from out loud we steal away its power. Strength is doing that which is harder, and weakness is succumbing to the simpler path of hiding from unpleasant things and pretending they do not exist. Seeing through a veil of denial to admit a truth you wish you could bury away is at the center of true strength. And what better way to acknowledge what you have denied than to say it and wear it proudly on your sleeve until it can be slain?
Strength is not the lack of emotion, courage is not the lack of fear and wisdom is not the lack of foolishness. If you do not feel then you have not defeated feelings; you cannot battle and outlast that which does not exist. In order for you to be strong you must feel. The more you feel the bigger your opportunity to be strong. If you are able to withstand a mountain's worth of feelings and still go through life unhinged and un-singed then and only then can you call yourself strong. But hiding away from things that exist and pretending you don't feel them in the name of strength is at the heart of weakness.
In the same way courage cannot exist if fear does not. How can you be courageous if you have no foe from within attempting to hold you back? Courage and bravery can only be found in the face of great fear, and if you go around screaming I do not fear anything then you are foolish and a coward who is too afraid to admit that they are afraid. No one fears nothing, but everyone pretends to themselves that they do not.
I can go on and on about my philosophy on opposites and how the presence of one proves the other, but suffice to say that strength, courage and wisdom cannot exist without pain and fear. If you are afraid then you are wise and have known enough life to know that fear is sometimes the epitome of logic, you are brave for acting against your fear and you are strong for being in its presence.
So in the name of saying words aloud in order to steal away their power, and in the name of admitting difficult truths and facing them head on, herein lies my confession. I fell, rose, battled, lost, rose, scarred, bruised, fell, rose and eventually won. I am not as whole as I once was, but I am stronger and with thicker skin. And at the end of all of that, even though in all the true meanings of the word I am fine, a deeper truth remains -I am traumatized.
There.
Strength is not the lack of emotion, courage is not the lack of fear and wisdom is not the lack of foolishness. If you do not feel then you have not defeated feelings; you cannot battle and outlast that which does not exist. In order for you to be strong you must feel. The more you feel the bigger your opportunity to be strong. If you are able to withstand a mountain's worth of feelings and still go through life unhinged and un-singed then and only then can you call yourself strong. But hiding away from things that exist and pretending you don't feel them in the name of strength is at the heart of weakness.
In the same way courage cannot exist if fear does not. How can you be courageous if you have no foe from within attempting to hold you back? Courage and bravery can only be found in the face of great fear, and if you go around screaming I do not fear anything then you are foolish and a coward who is too afraid to admit that they are afraid. No one fears nothing, but everyone pretends to themselves that they do not.
I can go on and on about my philosophy on opposites and how the presence of one proves the other, but suffice to say that strength, courage and wisdom cannot exist without pain and fear. If you are afraid then you are wise and have known enough life to know that fear is sometimes the epitome of logic, you are brave for acting against your fear and you are strong for being in its presence.
So in the name of saying words aloud in order to steal away their power, and in the name of admitting difficult truths and facing them head on, herein lies my confession. I fell, rose, battled, lost, rose, scarred, bruised, fell, rose and eventually won. I am not as whole as I once was, but I am stronger and with thicker skin. And at the end of all of that, even though in all the true meanings of the word I am fine, a deeper truth remains -I am traumatized.
There.
